Tackling Jealousy

For the month of April I am participating in the annual A-Z Blogging Challenge. The Challenge was started by author/blogger, Arlee Byrd. http://tossingitout.blogspot.com







Each day of the month (except Sundays) we will post something based on that days correlating letter. Some of us chose a theme and others are winging it. My theme is the A-to-Z’s of Mental Health, Raising Awareness. It is a topic that is very close to my heart. I hope you find the posts interesting and you will comment and share the posts everywhere. To see a list of all of the participants or for more information-click on the badge over there to the right>

Today’s letter is J

A-Z Letter J






That green eyed monster, jealousy is an emotion that we have all felt and had to deal with at some point during our lives. The feeling of jealousy is often a combination of several feelings such as anger, resentment, inadequacy, helplessness and disgust. Jealousy typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear and anxiety over an anticipated loss of something or someone of great value.

Jealousy is a typical experience in our human relationships. It has been observed in infants as early as five-months-old. There is ongoing debate as to whether it is seen in every culture.

While jealousy is a ‘normal’ emotion if it is felt from time to time  but if the emotion is keeping you from having a trusting, healthy relationship, if the thought stays with you for days or longer and is interfering with your job you may have a mental health issue.

While jealousy and envy seem to be interchangeable they are actually separate emotions. Jealousy involves feelings of loss and envy is a feeling of wanting.

Overwhelming feelings of jealousy can be corrosive to a relationship and can possibly escalate to violence. The best way to deal with jealousy is to understand it. If you truly examine what your fear is and develop a greater awareness of what triggers your jealousy you will be on your way to solving the problem.

A-Z the letter J photo Jealousy

Tackling Jealousy

First ask yourself:

Why do I feel threatened?

What am I afraid of losing?

 Consider what you believe is happening to cause you to have these feelings. Is there any truth to your belief? Most often there is no basis for the belief. It turns out your feelings are being fueled by fear. If you do not get a handle on your baseless jealousy you will most likely lose the person you are trying desperately to keep.

Try to imagine what it would be like to be your partner and to have to deal with irrational jealousy. Listen to your partner and always treat them with respect, as hard as that may be when you are feeling so insecure.

  • Do the exact opposite behaviors a jealous person would do. If your boyfriend is talking to a group of women, join the conversation. Be friendly.
  • Work on your self confidence. If you are having trouble act confident anyway.
  • Never compare yourself to others.
  • Examine your feelings. Is what you are asking of your partner realistic?
  • Practice trusting. It will be hard but you must do it anyway.
  • Start assuming the best of everyone and everything

If you find out your feelings of jealousy are founded and that person has continuously hurt you- leave the relationship.

Confident, healthy people do not stay in unhealthy relationships.


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