Posts Tagged ‘Kindness’

Kindness is Sending a Bowl of Berries…

Kindness

 

Those that know me best know that I’ve been preaching kindness pretty much since I started talking. It is a new year and a good time for all of us to do a little soul searching and a lot of kindness generating. The ugliness I have seen over the past six-months has been overwhelming. We all need to take a good long look in the mirror and decide if we like who we see looking back at us. Are we telling little girls who to be or are we showing them by example?

Some psychologists believe that ‘being nice’ isn’t really so nice after all. They believe being nice actually comes from a fear.

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Being Nice is Selfish?

Today’s post is part of the annual A-to-Z Blogging Challenge. Each day of April (except Sunday,) we write a post corresponding with that day’s letter of the alphabet. For more information on the challenge and its creator visit:

A-Z 2016 badge

 

My theme for this years’ A-Z Challenge is Keep Moving Forward

Kindness

Some psychologists believe that ‘being nice’ isn’t really so nice after all. They believe being nice actually comes from a fear. We ‘act’ nice towards someone because we want to be liked or we fear what others will think of us if we are not perceived of as a ‘nice’ person. As kids, especially little girls we were constantly told to ‘be nice’ and to ‘be sweet’ even to people we didn’t like. We were taught to keep the peace at all cost even if we were filled with hate. Some little girls learn very young how to use niceness as a way to get what they want and as they get older, as a way to gain power. Being nice is telling your boss to have a nice day because it sounds good but actually you could care less what kind of day she has.

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Choose Kindness…

Today’s post is part of the annual A-to-Z Blogging Challenge. Each day of April (except Sunday,) we write a post corresponding with that day’s letter of the alphabet. For more information on the challenge and its creator visit:

http://www.a-to-zchallenge.com

a-z 2015 k

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My theme for this years’ A-Z Challenge is An Intimate Look at the Homeless and Mental Health Epidemic in America which just happens to be the subtitle of my next book, The Stranger in My Recliner. The book is the true story of Sophie.  She was the eighty-year-old homeless woman that my husband brought home one night. She lived with us for nearly three –years. The book will be out this fall.

A to Z KINDNESS BANNER

Some psychologists believe that ‘being nice’ isn’t really so nice after all. They believe being nice actually comes from a fear. We ‘act’ nice towards someone because we want to be liked or we fear what others will think of us if we are not perceived of as a ‘nice’ person. As kids, especially little girls we were constantly told to ‘be nice’ and to ‘be good’ even to people we didn’t like. We were taught to keep the peace at all cost even if we were filled with hate. Some girls learned how to use niceness as a way to get what they wanted or as a way to gain power. Being nice is telling the cashier in the supermarket to have a nice day because it sounds good but actually you could care less what kind of day she has.

Cashier sad

Overly nice people usually have very low self- esteem and are only nice so they can feel better about themselves and so others will like them.

Being overly nice can put you at risk of being used and mistreated. It can leave you feeling powerless and out of control. It can cause unhappiness and even illness.

Being nice is being selfish.

Kindness on the other hand comes from real love, compassion and empathy towards fellow human beings and all living things. Compassion and empathy are real needs that some people have to help others or ourselves. It makes kindness the total opposite of being nice. Being kind is looking that cashier in the eye and saying, “It looks like you are very busy today. I hope you are done soon and can go home and relax,” and meaning every word. Being kind is opening and holding the door for an elderly woman, looking her in the eye and then taking her bags to her car for her. It is easy for kind people to be assertive because they care as much about themselves as they do others. They earn and expect respect.

Quote always be kind

Kindness is not a feeling it is a choice. It is a character quality that we can work on until it comes naturally. It is choosing to do the right thing even when the right thing is the hardest to do. There is a direct correlation between being kind and being happy. When we are truly good to others out of love we feel real happiness.

Being kind is being selfless.

Thank you for reading,

Doreen

I’m one of Lisa’s Live Wires! Lisa is a challenge co-host Lisa Buie-Collard.

A-Z 2015 Minion Badge

I am excited to be working with this bunch of fabulous bloggers …

Rhonda Albom –   Bob R. Milne –   Tamera Narayan –  Stephanie Faris

Heather McCubbin –   Randi Lee

 

Christmas Kindness …

 

http://www.midlifeboulevard.com

Someone asked me recently if I had a favorite Christmas kindness memory.  I have many but the first one that came to mind happened, almost thirty-years ago.

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